Star Wars Fans: If You've Never Seen 'Star Crash' The Farce Isn't With You
Roger Corman's Star Crash Is Fun, Funny & Just Plain Galaxy Spanning Cool
Creator George Lucas’ Star Wars is a certified global classic which spawned many cinematic imitators. It’s no surprise - imitation compels as always the sincerest form of profitability. Anything which promotes such dedicated love and pop culture success will engender more than a few timely clones.
Creator Glen Larson produced Battlestar Galactica. It was always considered one of the most famous Star Wars wannabes, released both as a feature film and broadcast on television as a precursor to the Lorne Green starring hit TV show. Classic BSG is one of the few clones which managed to stand tall to ultimately carve a respected legacy of its own.
These rip-offs - OK, let’s be nice, imitators - span an artistic range of bad to worse to unwatchable. A few rise Phoenix like above the mutant muck and mire to not only please discriminating sci-fi fans, but actually make it into an admirer’s permanent viewing library, residing there in a place of respect and even honor.
One of the best of the best, and yet, ironically, also worst of the worst, is a little sparkly gem from 1979 called Star Crash. Distributed by the great, tireless showman Roger Corman, and starring Marjoe Gortner, David Hasselhoff, Caroline Munro and Christopher Plummer, this bizarre jewel must be seen to be somewhat believed - because even then, you’ll keep wondering, Did I actually just see that shit happen?
The Seductive Sorcery of Filmmaker Roger Corman
Roger Corman is 95 years old. Roger Corman still produces movies. Roger Corman is clearly a genuine superhero. Guys half his age barely get by doing half of what he still does. This tells you a lot about this movie maverick, and in his long spanning career, the man made a movie about anything you can imagine. And like some low budget movie cranking version of the Energizer Bunny, he simply keeps going and going and going….
Corman’s early directorial career featured the legendary Vincent Price in beautifully produced horror films based on Edgar Allan Poe tales, such as Masque Of The Red Death, House of Usher and The Pit and The Pendulum. For most of Roger Corman’s later catalog, he acted as producer. These are simple B or even C level films, yet a decent quality and fun factor is ever present, in titles such as the original Piranha (1978) directed by Joe Dante and Rock N Roll High School, starring Clint Howard, PJ Soles and rock group, The Ramones, from 1979, all coming from Corman’s New World Pictures.
In the case of Star Crash, Nat Wachsberger actually made/produced the movie, with Corman being so impressed with the final product, he took up the film’s distribution in America.
The FX
An inexpensively produced movie - OK, cheaply made - doesn’t necessarily mean its special effects will be lackluster. Look at James Cameron’s first directorial effort in The Terminator. Arnold Schwarzenegger may be the greatest living FX prop of the movie, yet all of Cameron’s other visuals look more than first rate.
Star Crash’s model work, opticals and even brief forays into stop motion animation all work and look better than they should at this budget. What perhaps impressed me most of all was the starscapes - as the models engage in flybys and combat - the FX team infused backgrounds with precious jewel like brilliance. It may not be astronomically authentic, but the effect is more than delightful.
The Cast
Marjoe Gortner, David Hasselhoff, Caroline Munro and Christopher Plummer headline the cast. Munro acts well enough, but her voice is completely dubbed by another actress, Candy Clark, who was Marjoe Gortner’s wife at the time. It lends a surreal feel to her performance. Hasselhoff is years away from riding around in the KITT car busting baddies as Michael Knight. The make-up caked onto him and Gortner is just one of the many rib tickling pleasures you’ll find here. Gortner, usually a pretty solid actor in his other roles, is all over the map with his acting - and his character generates, intentionally or not, some of the biggest belly laughs in the whole show.
Christopher Plummer is on record saying how he loved making the move since it was shot in Rome, Italy and he loved the time spent there. His lines are delivered seriously - yet still remain mostly gut busting funny. All in all, though always fun and even funny, the earnest vibe of the whole thing makes it impossible to truly mock or dismiss it simply as a trashy flick. We’re all coasting along and in on the joyous joke and loving every minute of the spectacle.
The Cult
The cult classic status of Star Crash is well earned. Sometimes the term is thrown around for movies which while not exactly mainstream well received, exist as sort of obscure flops garnering minor attention. With this sci-fi romp, fans are fans - nobody’s getting on a promotional bandwagon to ensure its popularity. If you find it, as a sci-fi fan, chances are good you’ll happily join the cult of appreciation.
Star Crash became one of my favorite sci-fi epics for so many reasons. Visuals are always solid - if a bit dated, which only adds to its charm - and I love not seeing a wisp of digital or computer magic anywhere. The actors are familiar faces and though we’ve seen them act better, they do just fine here with generous camp moments, unintentional or not, being hilarious. As a friend of mine keenly observed, one of the best things Star Wars may have generated with its stratospheric success are its many clones or out and out rip-offs, which we’re still enjoying. Star Crash may be just that, but somehow it manages to be its own weird treasure to savor again and again.
Like many westerns which tried to ape the success of a Gary Cooper or John Wayne classic, films like Star Crash deliver fan fave goods in laser blasts, robots, aliens and spaceships. They are simple, even innocent. They don’t suffer franchise depression nor studio politics which bog down big titles. They are one shots. They are pure. They are what they are, and I’d watch them more than a tired sequel excuse which exists solely to justify a billion buck buyout of some once glorious science fiction space opera warping around a hyperspace galaxy on fumes.