Star Trek MMA: When Will Riker's Dad Kicked His Sorry Ass
Anbo-Jyutsu Let Commander Riker's Dad Whup His Son's Ass
Got a minute? Let’s see what’s out there…..
Gene Roddenberry built a fantastic, complex world full of science fiction intrigue and philosophical awe. Star Trek’s ultra loyal fandom surrounding his historic accomplishment is well known and it’s nothing short of legendary. Live long and prosper…. And it came to pass.
Despite a connected community which puts most other franchises to shame when it comes to devotion, the devotees of Roddenberry’s sci-fi Wagon Train To The Stars can’t always agree on everything under the blazing Vulcan sun or full Romulan moon. Here’s a definite Star Trek fact we can all agree on. When it comes to fathers, Will Riker’s Dad is one tough son of a bitch. His Dad impresses as one mean ass kicker.
Kyle Riker boarded his son’s Starfleet assigned Starship, USS Enterprise 1701-D, on a Starfleet mission. He used the time to also try to mend fences with his adult son, Commander Will Riker. Instead of using gentle techniques to reach him such as therapeutic chat, the wacky art of plexing (ask Counselor Troi & Lt. Barclay) or taking his son out to a holodeck baseball game - ask the DS9 crew, they swear by it - the senior Riker engaged in a martial arts bout and delivered an ass kicking unto Will he’d not soon forget. And nor would we.
Ass Kickers Dress Up In Cool Ass Kicking Gear
Ass kicking! Where would we be as a species without it? The time honored and respected practice comes in many styles and visuals. The look of one ass kicker over the other is one we can all relate to when watching our favorite ass kicking sport. Boxing, karate, wrestling, judo, MMA bouts, take your pick. The range of ass kicking is wide ranging indeed, and for the future in Star Trek: The Next Generation, supreme ass kicking requires a supremely cool outfit and gear.
Enter The Dragon? No, sorry, not now Bruce. How’s about Enter The Anbo-Jyutsu.
Make no mistake about the marvelous martial arts you’ll joyously witness in this TNG episode, The Icarus Factor. It’s butt busting and ass kicking stuff at the most advanced, futuristic level.
Take a gander at the glorious, galactic gear they wear while ass kicking.
Pure Pulaski Power
The battle based episode takes place in TNG’s second season. It’s one of the most formative times for the Enterprise crew. We get a new set - the luxurious 10 Forward watering hole, hosted by Guinan, played by Whoopi Goldberg. Dr. Beverly Crusher (Gates McFadden) exits her post and Dr. Kathryn Pulaski (Diana Muldaur) takes over as the ship’s Chief Medical Officer. And speaking of Pulaski, Kyle Riker doesn’t only have an intimate relationship in his son on Captain Jean-Luc Picard’s flagship vessel. Pulaski and Kyle Riker are also old flames.
Set phasers to HOT.
Pulaski has has more than a few critics over the years. She may have not been every fan’s cup of tea, but in this episode, she’s far more accessible. The tale helps humanize her and reminds us that everyone - good, bad, tough as nails, etc - has a past to plumb and put up for analysis. For Kyle Riker, he now has both a son and former girlfriend to relate to and perhaps even mend fences over.
Galactic Gladiators
In the end, as the two warriors come to terms over their real life differences, a bout of martial arts is chosen to be a way of settling things. And when it’s over, Will Riker finds himself beaten - but not so fair and square. It’s confession time for Kyle Riker.
For years, it seems dear old Dad lied to Will over what Anbo-Jyutsu techniques were legally permitted or not. Riker’s ass has been handed to him by his Dad, and his trust now even more eroded and forever broken, but hey, at least the two got to mix it up gladiator style in the coolest gear this side of a Ferengi yard sale.
So, let’s grab our teachable moment takeaway. Remember my pugilistic pals, family matters - even if it means knocking yours or your relative’s block off. Take a cue from Commander Will Riker and his butt basher of a father. If you have a beef with your Dad, dress up in funky faux galactic, gladiator gear complete with beeping, bleeping power staffs. Then proceed to pummel each other into complete submission. And if you don’t want to go through all that trouble, there’s always a more relaxed, civilized alternative; simply put on The Icarus Factor, grab a few brewskis and enjoy this Freudian fueled spectacle together.